Before Bob Sale got sick quite a few months back, he was the Retirees Meeting leader. In addition to giving away cute little trinkets that he made, he often told us funny stories. It is really good to have him back and see that he has not lost his sense of humor. At the July 26 Retiree's meeting, Bob Sale told the story below about himself and Charlene Morris.

Back in the old days at E-Systems I went to the Library to check out a document I needed to read. Charlene Morris was the Librarian. She told me that the document was much in demand and had to be returned in three days so others could check it out. I promised that I would have it back on time, put it in my briefcase and left.

When I got back to my office, my Director Ron Dillon was waiting on me and told me that I must leave for Beirut, Lebanon at once. There were major problems with one of our antennas over there. I told him that they shoot at American's over there. He said that he knew that and for me to be careful.

When I arrived on the Lebanon antenna site, I discovered that I still had the library document in my briefcase. I was stuck there for six weeks before I could leave.

When I finally arrived back at the plant I went straight to the library fearful that Charlene would be very angry that I had kept the document so long and might really let me have it.

When I entered, she was busy working on some papers on her desk. Trying to distract her from the late document, I told her, "Last night I dreamed I married the most beautiful, wonderful and sweetest girl in the world."

Without even looking up, Charlene said, "Were we happy?"

A big-city, California lawyer went duck hunting in rural Texas. He shot a bird, but it fell into Bob Sale's field on the other side of a fence. As the lawyer climbed over the fence, Bob drove up on his tractor and asked him what he was doing. The litigator responded, "I shot a duck and it fell into this field, and I'm going to retrieve it." Bob replied, "This is my property, and you are not coming over here."

The indignant lawyer said, "I am one of the best trial attorneys in the U.S.and, if you don't let me get that duck, I'll sue you and take everything you own." Bob smiled and said, "Apparently, you don't know how we do things in Texas. We settle small disagreements like this with the Texas Three-Kick Rule." The lawyer asked, "What is the Texas Three-Kick Rule?" Bob replied, "Well, first I kick you three times and then you kick me three times, and so on, back and forth, until someone gives up."

The attorney quickly thought about the proposed contest and decided that he could easily take the old codger so he agreed to abide by the local custom. Bob slowly climbed down from the tractor and walked up to the city feller. His first kick hit the lawyer's groin and dropped him to his knees. His second kick nearly wiped the man's nose off his face. The barrister was flat on his belly when Bob's third kick to a kidney nearly caused him to give up.

The lawyer summoned every bit of his will and managed to get to his feet and said, "Okay, you old coot! Now, it's my turn!"

Bob grinned and said, "Naw, I give up. You can have the duck!"